IT’S ALL RIGHT, REALLY by Hannah Beairsto

It’s ok, really. It is fine, no, honestly, I should have reminded you we were meeting for coffee. I know you’re busy as the ant who found half of a donut in the puddle behind the coffee shop. No, no, I wasn’t waiting long. I just ordered a latte, then crossed my legs in a table by the window so I could see the street and see you coming through the droplets in the glass. 

It’s all right, don’t apologize, I ordered a pastry when I’d finished the coffee, but after  five hours they kicked me out. I knew before then you weren’t coming, but it was raining outside, the pavement slick beneath cars that weren’t yours, my empty coffee cup clammy in my hand and I knew if I unglued myself from that seat to head out in the downpour I would ruin my dress and my makeup and I would start crying. And I’d keep crying and the tears and the rain  would runoff my skirt and dissolve together into the water cycle, streaked with eyeliner for contrast. I’d forgotten my umbrella. 

See, I forget things all the time, so it’s ok, it’s fine, we’ll get coffee next week. I know you’re busy with the husband and kids and that 401k while I couldn’t justify wasting money on a second cup of coffee so I could keep my seat longer, because I knew that wasn’t how it worked. No matter how much I sacrificed to the coffee shop, no matter how long I waited, or how hard I  cried in the parking lot rain, you weren’t going to come. 

I sat dripping in my car, watching that ant try to pick up the donut, crumbs melting away into the puddle. Since when do ants gather alone? 

It’s all right. Really. I had towels in the backseat. 

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Hannah Beairsto hails from the Poconos in Northeast Pennsylvania, home of ski resorts, waterfalls, and family fun. She has no pets, spouses, or children to brag about, and would like everyone to remember her first name is a palindrome. Follow her on Twitter at @thepalindrome12 and Instagram at @beairstohannah.

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